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1 in 3 kids are facing a confidence crisis – and it’s quietly affecting their whole future

1 in 3 kids are facing a confidence crisis – and it’s quietly affecting their whole future

New research shows low confidence peaks at age 16 – and it’s hitting girls and less advantaged children the hardest

girl at school looking sad and worried

Hollie Bond

Published: July 2, 2025 at 1:59 PM

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A new report* has raised the alarm about a growing crisis in children’s confidence – and it’s affecting everything from how likely they are to put their hand up in class to whether they’ll get the job they want in future.

The Listen Up Report from youth and education agency Hark found that 1 in 3 young people (31%) say they have little or no confidence – and that this “unheard third” is at risk of falling behind more confident peers throughout school, work and life.

And while we might usually think of confidence as a personal trait, the researchers argue that it's being shaped by far bigger forces – including gender, class, geography and the pressure to be ‘perfect’ online.

Children who lack confidence are being left behind. In school, in friendships, and in long-term prospects, diminished confidence reinforces their invisibility.

Victoria Millar, Hark’s co-founder

What age is this lack of confidence at its worst?

The survey looked at the experiences of over 1,400 11–18 year-olds from across the UK and found that confidence drops sharply in the middle teen years.

At age 11 (starting secondary), 71% feel confident
By 16 (GCSE age), only 65% do – and 35% say they have little or no confidence
Confidence then rises again to 74% at age 18

This slump during the exam years isn’t just about nerves – it’s a turning point that can affect a child’s life trajectory. The report links low confidence to less classroom participation, fewer friendship opportunities and lower aspirations.

It’s not just shyness – it’s a systemic issue

Children who struggle with confidence are less likely to speak up in class, join extra-curricular clubs, or share their opinions. Over time, this invisibility becomes a cycle that’s hard to break.

The report found that:

Only 7% of non-confident young people say they regularly express their opinions
67% never speak to adults they don’t know
Many are missing out on opportunities that could build confidence – from leadership roles to work experience

“Despite the best efforts of educators,” says Millar, “children who lack confidence are being left behind.”

Girls and kids from working class families are hit hardest

The research also highlights striking differences between demographic groups, echoing wider concerns about youth mental health inequalities.

34% of girls report little or no confidence, compared to just 27% of boys
Half of confident girls say they pretend not to be, because they worry about being seen as showing off
Among children from lower-income families, 37% say they lack confidence, compared to 27% from more affluent backgrounds

These patterns suggest that confidence is being shaped by social pressures and inequality – not just personality.

Where you live matters when it comes to confidence too

The study also found big regional gaps in confidence.

In London, 87% of young people said they felt confident – the highest in the UK
In contrast, only 43% in Northern Ireland and 41% in Wales said the same
Parts of the Midlands and the North also reported above-average levels of low confidence

Researchers believe this reflects differences in access to support services, youth opportunities and education funding, making this not just a personal issue but a structural one.

The impact on a child's future

Low confidence in childhood doesn’t just mean missed school clubs – it can limit life chances long after education ends.

Employers and apprenticeship providers are already reporting that young people are entering the workforce with lower soft skills, less self-belief and a greater fear of speaking up.

Confidence gaps aren’t personality traits. They’re broken social patterns shaping who gets seen and supported.

Victoria Millar, Hark

Hark is now calling on parents, schools, brands and community groups to do more to create safe spaces for quieter children to be heard, and to celebrate all kinds of progress – not just loud, high-achieving success.

How you can help as a parent

While tackling confidence inequalities requires systemic action from above, there are small ways parents can support their children. These include:

Noticing the quiet wins by praising effort and not just results
Talking about confidence as something that can grow, not something you either have or don’t
Modelling self-compassion – especially when you get something wrong yourself
Celebrating individuality by reminding children they don’t have to fit a ‘confident’ mould to be heard

Read the full Listen Up Report from Hark here.

*Survey methodology: The Listen Up survey spoke to 1,454 young people across the UK, from all four nations, covering a range of ages (11–18), ethnicities, genders and socioeconomic backgrounds.

Authors

journalist and two young kids sat on a bench in France for a review of Eurocamp

Hollie BondSenior Digital Journalist

Hollie is Senior Digital Journalist at MadeForMums. She writes articles about pregnancy, parenting, child health and getting pregnant. She has written for a number of national lifestyle magazines and websites over the past 12 years including Family History Monthly, You and Your Wedding and Muddy Stilettos. She has two children aged 5 and 8 and hasn't slept since 2017!