Home
Features
Why do our kids have so many toys? The parenting reset that could finally end the clutter

Why do our kids have so many toys? The parenting reset that could finally end the clutter

Too many toys can leave children overwhelmed and parents stressed. One parent explores why we're stuck in a cycle of excessive gifting - and how to break it.

Girl's head surrounded by lots of colourful toys looking shocked

Hollie Bond

Published: September 11, 2026 at 12:30 PM

Save

This feature was first published on our Apple News channel. Follow us on Apple News to see content like this first.

It's the second weekend in January and my husband and I have spent hours going through the stuff that is taking over our house and threatening to ruin our marriage.

I'm blowing dust off the top of a pile of unopened birthday presents my son received from his party in early October and putting them in the regift pile, while my husband is wondering how to fit the new – and barely touched – Christmas presents into our kids' bedrooms.

Decluttering has become the most common pastime in our house at weekends since we had our children in 2017 and 2021. Instead of going out or enjoying time together as a family we're constantly moving piles of toys and clutter from one part of the house to another in an attempt to sort our life out. But we never seem to get on top of it.

As soon as the house looks in order, grandparents will turn up with gifts from their holidays, a neighbour will drop by with a bag of hand-me-downs, or a well-meaning auntie will turn up with some magazines covered in plastic toys for her "favourite niece and nephew". And don't get me started on the plastic tat that comes home after every birthday party.

The kids still declare they have nothing to play with, my minimalist-loving husband can't cope with the mess, I get completely overwhelmed and give up, we all argue. And yet, at Christmas we still filled stockings with more gifts and bought presents for children in our extended family that we know have too many toys already.

And I know we're not alone.

What to see more MadeForMums in your search results? Tell Google!

From parenting news to expert advice and trusted product recommendations, make sure you don't miss the MadeForMums content that matters to your family. Add MadeForMums as a Preferred Source on Google.

Parents across the UK are quietly craving a reset when it comes to children's gifts. Fewer toys, less clutter, more meaningful moments. Yet despite best intentions, birthdays and Christmas still seem to end the same way for many families... with piles of presents, overwhelmed children and homes bursting at the seams. And, it's making everyone, including our kids, miserable.

So, how have we got into this mess and, if we know it's unhealthy, why can't we stop the cycle of excessive gifting?

Why do kids have so many toys these days?

children's toys scattered on the floor in the room and the silhouette of a boy in the background playing

New research suggests the issue is due to social pressure, and lots of it.

An organic survey of more than 1,000 parents by No Crap Parties, a movement to normalise more affordable and less wasteful gifting, found a clear gap between what parents value and what actually happens when it comes to gifting. While many parents want to do things differently, expectations from family, friends and wider culture are making that feel hard to act on.

One parent summed it up simply, saying: “Other family members bought way too much, including brand new items that will barely be used. It felt wasteful.”

Parents are open to change, but unfortunately tradition is winning.

According to the research, 81% of parents say they are completely happy for their children to receive second-hand gifts. Nearly half, 47%, say experiences matter more than presents, and 35% believe their child does not need more things.

Yet behaviour does not always match those values. Nearly a third of parents, 27%, said almost all of the gifts they bought this Christmas were brand new.

Half of parents admitted they felt pressure to buy more gifts than they wanted to. For those who felt their child received too many presents overall, grandparents were most often named as the biggest contributors, followed by other relatives. Gift overload, it seems, is usually driven by love and good intentions rather than excess for excess’ sake.

And it's hard to tell grandparents that the very thing they're doing to show their love – buying gifts – is actually having a negative impact on their family. I know that if I told my mother to stop spoiling her grandkids, she'd be offended and sad.

Charlotte Mason-Curl, founder of No Crap Parties and The Kids Party Pact, says many parents feel stuck.

“Parents are telling us that the current culture of gifting isn’t working for them,” she said. “They want celebrations to feel magical, but they know that excessive piles of new presents aren’t what create that joy. What’s missing is the social permission for parents to gift differently and do it with confidence.”

When ‘magical’ becomes overwhelming

Little girl holding tall stack of christmas presents, standing in living room

Even the moment of receiving gifts has lost its shine for some families. While most parents still describe opening presents as exciting and special, the experience can be far from calm. One in five parents said their child found Christmas gift opening overwhelming, a quarter felt it was rushed, and nearly half believed their child received more gifts than they actually needed.

That sense of overload does not disappear once the wrapping paper is cleared away. Separate research paints a familiar picture of cluttered living rooms and forgotten toys.

According to Whirli, a toy swapping subscription service, 80% of parents say their children receive too many toys at Christmas. Around 77% feel their homes are overrun with toys, and 70% report piles of unopened gifts still lying around by March.

Parents estimate that around 15% of toys bought in a year are quickly neglected or forgotten, with many still in their packaging. Across the UK, parents estimate the value of these unloved toys at more than £90 per household.

Juliette Savage, Commercial Director at Little Starts Gift Cards, a gift card for baby, toddler and preschool classes and activities, says the emotional impact is often misunderstood.

“Parents aren’t ungrateful, they’re simply overwhelmed,” she said. “Toys spark instant joy, but many end up forgotten, broken, or cluttering our homes. This isn’t about cutting gifting cheer, it’s about creating lasting memories and well-being.”

What experts say about toy overload

Decluttering expert Katrina Hassan from Spark Joy London says the problem goes deeper than mess.

“After reading an incredible book called Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne, I understood just how overwhelmed children can be when they have too many toys staring back at them,” she said. “He advises having no more than 12 toys out at one time.”

The reason, she explains, is simple. “Children love novelty. Whenever we switch over our toys, their interest is renewed in the toys they had forgotten about, creating a new sense of excitement around playing. It feels like Christmas when we bring out the items from rotation storage.”

Academic research backs this up. A study published in Infant Behaviour and Development found that toddlers given just four toys played more deeply, more creatively and for longer than children given sixteen. Other research has linked cluttered homes with increased stress for parents and reduced quality of parent-child interactions. Something I can certainly vouch for.

How parents can use celebrations as a reset moment

Cute little boy giving his mother box full of toys in small cozy apartment

Rather than seeing birthdays and Christmas as moments to add more, Katrina encourages parents to use them as a natural pause point.

“Be extremely mindful about what you allow to enter your home in the future,” she said. “Use birthdays and Christmas as a prompt to revisit the category of toys to see if there is anything your child wishes to pass on.”

She adds that this process takes time. “Don’t be disheartened if they don’t want to part with things at first, just be consistent in providing the opportunity for them to complete ‘happy checks’ on their toys, posing the question ‘does this item make me happy?’.”

Involving children in donating toys can also help shift the focus. “Use this time as a chance to teach your child that there are children less fortunate whom they may wish to pass on some items to. Try to involve them in the visit to the charity shop also, as it’s beneficial for children to see the ‘exit strategy’ in operation.”

How parents can work together to do things differently

Encouragingly, nearly half of parents surveyed by No Crap Parties said it is okay to do things differently when it comes to gifting. One in four said the key message they want to carry into future celebrations is that less is more.

Campaigns like The Kids Party Pact aim to normalise those choices, encouraging parents to opt for fewer, more thoughtful gifts and less wasteful party bags, without fear of judgement.

For many families, the desire is not to take joy away from childhood celebrations, but to reclaim it. Less clutter, less pressure, and more space for children to actually enjoy what they are given, and for parents to breathe a little easier too.

I, for one, will be making a change this year by asking family members and friends to buy experiences for my children or put money they would spend on presents into my kids' savings instead. And, I might even embrace an idea that for some reason used to make me shudder... instead of parents buying individual gifts at a birthday party, putting the money they'd all spend on a gift card together for my child to spend on one larger item that they would really love.

Party bags at my kids' parties will be replaced by a secondhand book and a slice of cake and I'm going to be strict about saying no to any hand-me-downs that I don't want in my house. I'm also going to continue rotating toys, which my kids respond very well to and has bought me hours of peace to, yep that's right... declutter!

Authors

journalist and two young kids sat on a bench in France for a review of Eurocamp

Hollie BondSenior Digital Journalist

Hollie is Senior Digital Journalist at MadeForMums. She writes articles about pregnancy, parenting, child health and getting pregnant. She has written for a number of national lifestyle magazines and websites over the past 12 years including Family History Monthly, You and Your Wedding and Muddy Stilettos. She has two children aged 5 and 8 and hasn't slept since 2017!