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Not in the mood? 7 surprising ways sex could be helping your brain, from stress to memory

Not in the mood? 7 surprising ways sex could be helping your brain, from stress to memory

Regular sex doesn’t just feel good – it could be quietly shaping your brain in ways you might not expect. Experts explain why prioritising pleasure may have surprising long-term benefits for your mental and cognitive health.

Jessica Dance

Kat Storr

Published: October 11, 2026 at 7:30 AM

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The focus on how to live healthily, for longer, is hard to ignore right now. It can feel like we’re being bombarded with advice, science and opinions on how to optimise our sleep, diet and exercise routines so we can stay fit and strong into old age. However, one area often left out of the spotlight which can also have an impact on our longevity, is our sex life.

While sex is often the first thing to fall down the priority list when we’re tired and overwhelmed, being aware of the fact that sexual arousal and orgasms can lead to a range of health benefits might make it worth jumping into bed for.

Even if intimacy is the last thing on our minds at the end of a long day, most of us feel a noticeable improvement in tension, wellbeing and connection with our partner after we have sex. Neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart says: “Regular sex improves mood, happiness, relaxation, sense of belonging, self-esteem, reduces stress and improves sleep quality. It also contributes to enjoyment of life and positive world views more generally.”

But, on top of these mental health benefits, we wanted to find out a bit more about how having sex is good for our brain as an organ.

Sex as a stress reliever

Man and woman couple kissing body chemistry. Brain activity in the limbic system. Love, emotion, interaction, partnership, neuroscience, psychology, science conceptual 3d rendering illustration.

We all have times of high-stress in our lives but if our levels of the hormones cortisol and adrenaline are continuously elevated for long periods of time, it can have a negative impact on our brain health.

Some studies have shown that chronic stress and anxiety can increase your risk of dementia as you get older. And the Alzheimer’s Society says: “Stress also affects the immune system, which is known to play an important role in the development of dementia. Stress can lead to the release of chemical signals that trigger inflammation in the body and brain. Chronic inflammation in the brain can damage cells and affect how well brain cells communicate.”

Activities (like sex) that reduce the stress response can be helpful in promoting longer-term brain health.

While the causal relationship between sex and our brain health is hard to prove through research, we know that sexual activity and sexual satisfaction reduces cortisol levels which helps our body move from ‘fight or flight’ mode to a more relaxed state. And of course, you don’t need to have a partner to find sexual pleasure and ease your stress levels.

Psychotherapist Eloise Skinner adds that long-term stress conditions can also lead to things like “burnout, exhaustion and overwhelm – meaning that activities (like sex) that reduce the stress response can be helpful in promoting longer-term brain health”.

Sex and ‘happy’ hormones

While getting in the mood for sex can sometimes be hard when we’re tired, hormonal or feeling rubbish about how we look naked, these negative feelings dissipate once foreplay starts. This is because sexual arousal in a healthy relationship causes the release of a range of hormones which improve our mood and help us feel loved. These hormones – dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins (DOSE) – are often referred to as our ‘happy hormones’.

Close-up portrait of a mature woman.

Dr Swart says the release of these hormones during sex has many mental health benefits, which in turn help our overall brain health. “As these hormones all have a cascade impact on each other, when the DOSE hormones are higher, we do not experience the survival emotions as much. Instead we are more likely to be experiencing trust, excitement, joy and love. As chronic low level stress is the single biggest threat to neurons, being in the attachment or thriving state more of the time, is neuro-protective.”

Sexual pleasure is part of our wellbeing

It’s important to stress that having sex isn’t essential for your brain health. We know that there are times when your libido is going to be low, especially if you’re exhausted from caring for small children, work stress or life’s mental load. You might not have a partner or have medical issues which prevent you from having full intercourse.

Positive, willing experiences that feel good and reduce stress are what matter.

Marie Morice, clinical sexologist

Other forms of intimacy such as kissing and touching also have health benefits. “The overarching message from research isn’t ‘how often [should we have sex]?’ but that positive, willing experiences that feel good and reduce stress are what matter,” clinical sexologist Marie Morice says.

“When we talk about sexual wellbeing, we’re often really talking about nervous system regulation. Experiences that genuinely reduce stress and create feelings of safety and pleasure can support long-term emotional resilience," she says.

"The benefits may not be as consistent where the relationship is not as emotionally strong, or where sex is seen as a purely physical activity.”

But remember that we all have different brains and bodies so we won’t all have the same neurochemical responses to sexual arousal and orgasms. And let’s be realistic, whether it’s a night of wild passion or Tuesday night maintenance sex, not every sexual encounter will leave us feeling the same way.

Skinner adds: “It’s worth noting that these benefits are generally present in connected, trusting, respectful and reciprocal relationships, and so the benefits may not be as consistent where the relationship is not as emotionally strong, or where sex is seen as more of a purely physical activity, rather than one that deepens connection.”

Sex and cognitive function

Small studies, such as one in the The Journals of Gerontology from 2017, have found that older adults who were sexually active achieved higher scores on some types of cognitive tests, in particular when it came to the dopamine controlled system of executive function and working memory. Morice explains: “This doesn’t prove that sex directly ‘protects’ the brain. But it does suggest that sexual wellbeing may form part of a broader healthy lifestyle pattern associated with cognitive health.”

High angle view of senior couple in love, lying in a bed and hugging.

And Dr Swart says that in the same way that exercise improves our respiratory system, having sex benefits our circulatory system. Even if you’re not having the most vigorous of bedroom sessions, your heart and breathing rates will still be raised, which boosts the flow of oxygen and nutrients to the brain – and around the rest of your body.

As well as an increase in oxygenation to our central nervous system, Dr Swart says it also causes “surges in neurogenesis, which is the growth of embryonic neurons into mature neurons that can connect up with other neurons via their synapses and improve brain density”. She explains that this promotes neuroplasticity throughout the brain, often with effects such as improved mood, concentration, memory and focus.

Maintaining healthy blood flow to your brain is also important for lowering your risk of serious health problems such as stroke and vascular dementia.

Sexual pleasure and brain health

Psychotherapist Tina Chummun says: “For individuals seeking to optimise both sexual satisfaction and associated brain health benefits, the emphasis should be on creating conditions that support the brain’s capacity for sexual response, so referencing stress reduction, relationship communication, emotional intimacy and understanding of individual sexual response patterns rather than adherence to prescriptive sexual scripts.”

Morice adds: “I believe we need to start viewing pleasure as part of overall wellbeing. Not indulgence. Not pressure. Simply one meaningful component of looking after our brains and bodies over time.”

About the author

Kat Storr is a freelance journalist based in London, with more than 15 years’ experience in digital media. She began her career at Sky News, covering everything from terror attacks to royal births and major celebrity stories, before moving into freelance writing. She now regularly contributes to UK and US titles including woman&home, Stylist, The i, Metro and HuffPost UK. Since becoming a mum to three sons, Kat has focused much of her work on parenting, relationships, and health and wellbeing. She has written widely on postnatal mental and physical health, exercising with hypermobility, and coping with sleep deprivation. Outside of work, she can often be found swimming at Tooting Lido, enjoying a solo cinema trip, or happiest of all, on a beach.

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Kat Storr